Realising that I'm never going to be able to do it all.
I'm never going to be able to do it all.
I've somehow become one of those people that has about 27 plates all spinning at once, and I'm only just starting to realise that it's pretty impossible to keep everything up at the rate that I really want to.
I always feel like I need to be doing more. I had an overwhelming realisation a couple of weeks ago that I am now 6 years into my career and 'oh my god should I have achieved more by now? Should I be further on than I am? Am I falling behind where I should be?' And it was only after a conversation with a friend who very much has her head screwed on, that I realised that I'm actually doing pretty okay and I should stop panicking.
But, it's not just with my career that these thoughts creep up on me pretty regularly. It's quite literally every aspect of my life.
But then, my god I haven't been to the gym in over a year. I should spend my mornings in the gym. And then an hour or so at the weekend too. I need to get back in fitness and look after my body again. Which means I also need to spend time meal prepping and eating healthier and doing big shops after work.
But oh, what about this blog? This has always been something that brought me so much happiness and I don't want to neglect this now, either. I've also had this blog for 4 years now, it definitely should be getting more views. And my Instagram should be getting more engagement. And I should go back to commenting on blogs more. And everyone else is turning their blog into a business and oh good gosh I should work on this too.
There would literally not be enough hours in the week for me to get everything done, as well as work my ~actual~ job. That wasn't even taking into consideration time to see friends and family, sleep or generally look after myself a little.
I mean, it would be pretty fabulous if we could do it all, wouldn't it? If we had enough time in the day to devote to everything that we wanted to and still have time to catch Love Island at 9. Now that would be a dream.
For now, I think accepting that I'm never going to be able to do or balance it all is a start. Accepting that it's physically, and mentally impossible. That it's okay if I take an evening off every once in a while because I'm not quite feeling like myself and it's okay if I have to devote a little more time to one project than the other some weeks. And that actually, that's totally okay.