Sophie Rosie

Hello, you.

Welcome to my blog. I write about life, career & work, fashion & style, as well as hopefully providing some inspiration to achieve some of your goals too! Enjoy xx

In defence of; never taking your own advice.

In defence of; never taking your own advice.

I think I speak for most girls when I say… we are terrible at taking our own advice. Most notably when it comes to boys and dating and relationships. I know that I do it all of the time. I can sit with my best friend and tell her what she should do about her boyfriend troubles or guys that my friends are dating. I can grab coffee with girls I work with and provide advice on how to deal with their boss, but then I'm somehow incapable of applying it to my own situations when, quite often, I'm pretty much having the same problems. But why is this? Why is it that we can give practical solutions to our friends, but at the same time find ourselves in a bit of a mess?

I think I speak for most girls when I say… we are terrible at taking our own advice. Most notably when it comes to boys and dating and relationships. I know that I do it all of the time. I can sit with my best friend and tell her what she should do about her boyfriend troubles or guys that my friends are dating. I can grab coffee with girls I work with and provide advice on how to deal with their boss, but then I'm somehow incapable of applying it to my own situations when, quite often, I'm pretty much having the same problems.

But why is this? Why is it that we can give practical solutions to our friends, but at the same time find ourselves in a bit of a mess?


IMG_1885.JPG

"Take my advice - I'm not using it!"

This became apparent more than ever the other day when one of my friends was explaining how the guy she was seeing had treated her in a certain situation, and I remember being so shocked and mortified and instantly told her that something needed to change. I told her that it was unfair and not at all right the way he had spoken to her, how he had acted and the things he had said.

IMG_1887.JPG

And then I proceeded to think about how the guy in my life had pretty much been doing the exact same things. Have I distanced myself from him like I advised my friend? Lol, nope. Of course I haven't. And I think it's because we convince ourselves that our situation is special. That we have all of this extra 'inside information' that actually makes our relationship or our job so different to everyone else's, and therefore the tried and tested advice doesn't apply to us.

But also, I think it goes back to that idea of how unkind we can be to ourselves. We have those voices in our heads that say things to ourselves that we would never say to a friend. Some day's I can stand there and look in the mirror and say 'I look shit today' or 'I really need to get back to the gym' or, on really bad days 'I'm terrible at everything and I'm never going to get anywhere in life'.

Can you imagine saying that to a friend? I'm not sure they'd be your friend for much longer tbh, so why is it okay to treat ourselves like this?

I've also thought about the idea that we can understand something in our heads, but until we feel like it's what we need and actually want to do, we probably won't. So, I know what I need to do to make me happier. In the example before, I understand that in order to make things better, I need to distance myself from someone for a while. But, without going super cheesy and the whole 'head and heart' thing, until I totally feel this and feel that it's that I want to do, I'm probably not going to. One of my best friends and I have a little bit of a joke about it every time we see each other. We sit there and say 'well, this is what you should do, but we both know you're not going to, you're going to do whatever the hell you want… but I'm going to tell you again anyway'.

I've also thought about the idea that we can understand something in our heads, but until we feel like it's what we need and actually want to do, we probably won't. So, I know what I need to do to make me happier. In the example before, I understand that in order to make things better, I need to distance myself from someone for a while. But, without going super cheesy and the whole 'head and heart' thing, until I totally feel this and feel that it's that I want to do, I'm probably not going to.

One of my best friends and I have a little bit of a joke about it every time we see each other. We sit there and say 'well, this is what you should do, but we both know you're not going to, you're going to do whatever the hell you want… but I'm going to tell you again anyway'.

So, if you're sat there wondering why you can never take your own advice, be assured in the knowledge that we all do it… or, well, don't do it!

Soph

7 of my favourite podcasts that you need in your life, too.

7 of my favourite podcasts that you need in your life, too.

Is being 'just a blogger' enough anymore?

Is being 'just a blogger' enough anymore?