These photo's were taken on one of these days. They were purposely taken from afar, and with my face hidden in half of them because I'd cried all of my make-up off by this point. It may look like I'm smiling, but I can tell that this is not my usual, happy-self smile. It was forced for the camera because, in typical blogger style, I didn't want to waste being in such an Instagramable location.
Why? Because my plans had gone from being all day, to just a few hours. I'd been looking forward to this day for a while, and then all of a sudden, it wasn't happening anymore. The plans we had, were literally impossible to fit into the few hours we had left, and it was like I just didn't know how to cope with this realisation. Most people would just rearrange, right? Not me. Yes, I was sad for a number of reasons, but all of these ridiculous and anxious thoughts just filled my head and I became very overwhelmed.
'What if I never get this chance again? What if I never have a whole day to spend in Liverpool again and this was the only time we could've done this and now we won't be able to? What if things have changed because I did something wrong? What if I've ruined our friendship and they don't want to see me anymore? What if they're trying to distance themselves all of a sudden and that's why they've cancelled?'
Lol. All of these are ridiculous, and I know that. Well, I know that now. But at the time, these were all very real thoughts that literally ruined my whole day.