Social media & me.



Social media & me: My relationship with living online.

Social media has become a vital part of our everyday lives for most of us. Our whole worlds revolve around it, and in a lot of ways, it has had a real positive impact to the modern day life of a twenty-something. We're creating careers from it, influencing and reaching others in a way that has never been possible before, and of course, remaining connected to our loved ones no matter where in the world they are.

However, I've recently started to realise that my relationship with social media isn't always that healthy.

I often wonder how less anxious I would be if read receipts weren't a thing. If 'last active' wasn't available to us or if our whole online lives were left unfiltered and we could see everything or nothing. I mean, I'm not stupid. I know that the things that people share online isn't always an accurate representation of their life, but it's always hard not to compare and get yourself down about it, isn't it? There's been so many times when I've felt like I'm failing at life because I've seen something on Instagram or Twitter.


I'm not afraid to admit that I'm the kind of girl that freaks out if I can see you've read my message and not replied to it. I have a huge fear of people leaving my life suddenly, and it's like a read receipt and no reply is a trigger for this fear. No matter how much I try and convince myself that they're just busy, at work, distracted, eating (or y'know, anything else normal), my brain just won't have it. Instead, it convinces me that this person now hates me for life, is never going to speak to me ever again or that I've upset them in some way. That is until they text back 30 mins later having just gone for an impromptu nap.

This girl does not need this kind of anxiety multiple times on a daily basis.


And it's not just read receipts. There's seeing them having been active on Facebook, tweeting someone, viewing your Instagram story, 'last seen' on WhatsApp, or their snapchat score has gone up so they're obvs on their phone because how else would all of this have happened?

The reason I hate it so much, is because I know that without social media, I'd be blissfully unaware of everything, and not causing myself unnecessary stress and panic.

So, how am I making my relationship with social media better?

Well, I'm trying to restrict the time I spend on it, but we all know how hard that can be, even with the best of intentions! 

However, I'm also removing as many things that I can, in an attempt to control the anxiety I get from it. I'm muting toxic people on Twitter, I'm turning off read receipts on WhatsApp and the chat feature on Facebook. I'm unfollowing people on Instagram who's content makes me feel shit and I'm turning off my push notifications so I don't get into a panic if no one likes one of my fave photo's.

Hopefully, some of this will help in making me feel a lot better most days, and I won't be sat here worrying myself silly that I'm behind in life, that I'm super boring because my day doesn't look like hers or that my best friend has left me.


What's your relationship with social media like?


Soph


14 comments

  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  2. I love this post! I have just started thinking about my own relationship with social media and actually wrote a post for next week about having a bit of an Instagram cull. I couldn't agree more with you, I feel most of us have an unhealthy relationship with their platforms and we all put far too much pressure on ourselves.

    RobynLouise x

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  3. Digital decluttering is something I do quite regularly because it's important to me to make sure that everything I see in my feed, whether it's Instagram or Twitter, inspires me in one way or another :) I can definitely relate to the anxious feeling when people read a message but don't text back though x

    Sara’sChapters

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  4. Ah gal, I totally get where you are coming from. It can be so hard to just switch off but I really need to start doing that a bit more too. I might try restricting myself to how much time I am on it too, it's a step in the right direction ha xo
    misszarabelle.com

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  5. I totally feel you lady! Loved this because it's so relatable. xo

    Georgina xx

    http://www.georginahartofficial.com/

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  6. I totally get where you're coming from. It's so hard to switch off sometimes and I'm also the girl worrying because someone's read my message and not replied haha! it's so relatable
    Jen, Velvet Spring. xo

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  7. As a journalist and blogger social media is a massive part of my life and in some cases my job, but sometimes I do think we all need to just switch off. The amount of times Ive gone out with friends and family and we have all been sat on our phones instead of talking is ridiculous.
    www.justemmi.com

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  8. I loved this post! It's sometimes really scary when you think about how much time we actually spend on social media. This post made me reflect on my own relationship with social media and I think the feeling to cut it back was just right and I definitely do that.
    Lea, xx
    www.asnippetoflife.com

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  9. Great post. I totally know the feeling, especially when it comes to read receipts. I just try to remind myself to use my wise mind and realize that sometimes the reason someone doesn't respond is because a) they read it and something came up and they never actually got around to replying, b) they started to reply, something came up and they forgot to send it, and c) sometimes others are so anxious about how to reply to something that they don't get around to saying anything. I'm not sure if that's helpful for you but it helps me to worry less. Good luck and keep up the great writing!

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  10. I totally agree.. social media is an amazing thing but you have to keep your distance sometimes..

    xx Lisa
    lisaautumn.com

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  11. Totally agree with you here Soph. I have a bit of a love-hate relationship with it all recently. I LOVE how I can chat to my mumma every day whilst she is out in Vietnam, I love how we can reminisce on good times. But at the same time, I dislike how much if affects my mood in a negative way. I hate the fact that loosing a handful of followers on Instagram will genuinely put me in a slightly anxious mood, ain't that crazy?! I have started to really try and limit my time spent scrolling. I am trying to see it as a creative outlet and a place to be inspired by photography, not by numbers. Immy x

    www.immymay.com

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  12. I completely agree with you, I've always had a love/hate relationship and major anxiety with social media. I've made it my goal from March onward to have one day dedicated to my blog/social media and then to have one day completely free of social media to attempt to rid that anxiety of numbers, likes and notifications!

    Danielle xx
    | Danielle Levy |

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  13. I love this post! I totally agree, I often get jealous/feel disappointed in my own life because of what other people are posting on instagram even though I know that is only 1 second of their life and staged! I just think it's something that hopefully we'll all get better at as social media develops and becomes just part of life opposed to being studied and analysed like it is now x
    Lydia x
    itsheredition.wordpress.com

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  14. This is so me! You've inspired me to write a post about my similar experiences, I hope you don't mind? I'll defo link back to your post <3

    www.damzelinthisdress.com

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