Grab a cuppa, I feel like I just need to chat, and this might be a long one. 

A couple of weekends ago, I grabbed a few friends and dragged them over to New Brighton. The weather was just perfect and I guess I needed a walk to clear my head, whilst also feeling the need for some company. The sun was out, but it was still cold enough to get wrapped up in a scarf and cosy jacket, to grab a coffee and then enjoy the fresh air, the perfect blue hues of the sky, and the beautiful smell of the sea air.

And now, now I'm grabbing you guys and hoping that you'll just let me chat for a little while. I have no idea where this post is going to go, or what the overall subject matter is going to be. But I haven't just sat down and written something in a while, and I guess I kinda miss that. So, here goes.

There's a lot going on in this little head of mine at the minute. I'm excited and happy. But I'm confused, feeling fragile and a little scared. I'm enjoying the little things in life but I'm longing to satisfy an inner craving of something bigger. I'm aware that I'm lucky and in a fabulous position right now, but that doesn't mean that I feel complete.

I feel like there's something missing, and while part of me can't quite explain it exactly, there's a part of me that knows exactly what I want. I have countless posts sat in my drafts, each one trying to explain exactly how I'm feeling; open letters to people in my life who I care about, attempting to explain where I'm at and why I may have been acting a little distant or different, lately. I doubt any of these will see the light of day, but writing is my outlet and sometimes it just helps, right?

This same weekend, I'd spent the Saturday wandering around the city and taking all of the photo's of everything. And there was a moment when I was looking up at The Royal Liver Building on Liverpool docks, there was hardly anyone else around and I just felt this overwhelming sense of pure joy. I just started smiling and laughing to myself because I realised that actually, life was good. I was happy. 

And then that evening I returned to an empty flat, and I felt suddenly alone again. And it's this constant conflict and emotional battle that gets me down, sometimes. In the same way that some days, I'm the most independent girl you'll ever meet. I'm more than happy to spend days by myself, getting things done, keeping myself occupied and feeling a little like a girl boss accomplishing everything on my to-do list. And then other days, I find myself curled up under my duvet feeling lost, down and like I really just need a good old hug.

If there's one thing that I'd say about myself, it's that I'm fiercely loyal. If we're friends, if we're close, if we chat all the time then there's probably nothing that I wouldn't do for you. If you needed me in the middle of the night then I'd find a way to get to you. If you suddenly found yourself upset, then I'd absolutely do anything to try and comfort you. Or if you confide in me that you're feeling a little down, I'll go out of my way to bring you a little surprise to cheer you up.

But, sometimes I forget that not everyone feels and thinks in the same way I do, and this... loyalty is probably the wrong word... but this, showing that you're cared about, I guess, isn't always reciprocated as much or in the same way, and I think it's this that's been getting to me a little recently. Now, the people that I have in mind when writing this, they don't do it on purpose. Because I know that they do actually care - they just have different ways of showing it to me. But as a girl who needs a lot of reassurance from everyone in her life, it gets hard, sometimes.

I know that life always has a way of working things out, and that this feeling is just a little blip, and to be honest, I think I know how I can fix it. But it's that age old problem of knowing that things are going to have to get harder before they get better, and thats scary sometimes, right?

Anyway, normal and more upbeat posts will resume as of tomorrow. Promise! :)


Sometimes, you've just got to be brave.

Okay, so don't worry, I'm not going to throw the whole 'life begins at the end of your comfort zone' quote down your throat throughout the whole of this post, because lets face it, it's most probably become one of those terribly overused and cheesy quotes that we're all fed up of hearing, right? But the actual message is something that I've come to realise is pretty true.

Taking those first steps, or just generally throwing yourself in some cases, out of your comfort zone can be terrifyingly exhilarating. I've never really classed myself as a 'brave' kinda girl, but recently, I've found myself trying and enjoying things that have previously terrified me, and to be quite honest it feels pretty fabulous.

They say that 'fear is temporary, regret is forever.' and I couldn't agree more with this. There are so many opportunities and experiences that I feel like I've missed out on because I've been too scared. But then there have been other times when I've thrown myself into them anyway and had the best time. And I always can't help but think how this would have probably been the case if I could've beaten my own mind all of those times before.

Someone said 'I need you to be brave for me.' recently, and jesus I've never felt the need to make sure I overcome a fear of mine so much before. Because, for me, there's nothing that motivates me to try and push myself further than having someone else telling me that they believe that I can. Maybe this shouldn't be the case, maybe I should be strong enough to motivate myself all the time, but sometimes the fear of letting someone else down, and letting them see that they were wrong about me, places more fear into my head than the fear of the thing itself.

But, I think that one of the most important things to remember is that my 'brave', is probably a lot different to yours, but that doesn't mean that overcoming something that someone else considers to be 'nothing', should be belittled or you should think that it's not an achievement. 

The feeling you get after doing something that scares you, is pretty addictive. It's a natural high that always leaves me wanting to feel it again and again, but getting to that point is always pretty mentally exhausting. But I think that we should always strive to be better, shouldn't we? And sometimes, telling yourself that you need to do something that scares you is simply part of this, don't you think?

Anyway, I feel like I'm rambling a little now, so I'm just going to leave you guys with this quote;

'When life gives you something that makes you feel afraid, that's when life gives you a chance to be brave.'


F E A T U R E D  I N  T H I S  P O S T

b.tempt'd lace kiss lingerie set  - you probably all know that I love pretty underwear by know, so when the lovely ladies from b.tempt'd emailed me and asked if I wanted to work with them, I mentally went 'OMG YES.' as soon as I visited their website. Their pieces are so, so pretty and feminine and I absolutely love this lace kiss set that they sent out to me. I basically live in bralette's now, in fact, I can't remember the last time I wore an actual bra. And this set fits and suits me just perfectly.

For my full disclaimer, please click here.

Having hope & faith that things will be just fine, is sometimes everything you need to keep you going.

There's a street in The Georgian Quarter of Liverpool called Hope Street. And a lot of people say that it got it's name because there are 2 Cathedrals that sit at either end; The Metropolitan Cathedral (pictured above), and The Liverpool/Anglican Cathedral (just about pictured below) - and so Hope Street is the street that connects the two. 

I've actually recently learned that it was, in fact, named after a chap called William Hope who had a house on the corner. But I like the first story better, don't you?

Hope is a funny thing; because like dreams and faith and anything else that involves some sort of belief, you can't see it. But boy, is it necessary sometimes, right? 

From taking risks that you're not entirely sure how they're going to pan out, to trying to deal with situations and past events, hoping and believing that you're going to get through it all, that you're strong enough to cope, and having to just have faith that everything will be okay, is something that can really stop us all from giving up. I know it's proved essential for me in the last few years or so.

They say that letting go of things is often the way forward and the way to move on, but sometimes hope & faith are two things that you just need to hold on to for the sake of your own sanity. And, I guess it's similar to the belief that changing the way you think can change your attitude and outlook on life.

Think positively and you'll feel much better. Your mind will always believe everything that you tell it. So, feed it with hope, and provide yourself with a constant reminder. For me, it's my tattoo. I have the tiniest tattoo of a little cross on the inside of my right wrist. It's somewhere that I can see this little symbol of faith and belief every day, and you have no idea how much this little self-reminder has helped me through, some days.

And I don't think that it always has to be anything huge that you feel like you're fighting to turn to hope. It could just be little things like 'I hope this bad day gets better for me.', or 'I really hope that I still have that emergency chocolate in the cupboard' - because lets face it, chocolate can turn any bad day into a good one, right?


How to not feel so tired all of the time.

Whenever I seem to ask any of my friends how they are at the minute, the general response is 'yeah I'm fine, I'm just TIRED.' Everyone seems to be super tired, all of the time, myself included. And to be honest, it's not really much of a surprise considering how busy our lives get. Sometimes, I find myself wondering whether feeling constantly worn out is just another part of our modern-day lives that we're somehow supposed to get used to. 

But, as I read somewhere once, if our minds and our bodies are healthy, then we should feel amazing no matter how full our daily schedules are. So, I decided to start doing some research, and I found that there are some relatively simple lifestyle changes out there that will hopefully help us all not feel so terribly exhausted every day!

S L E E P  

Okay, don't look at me like that. Hear me out. We all may tell ourselves that of course we're getting enough sleep, but are you really? I don't know about you, but I'll take myself off to bed at 10.30pm, with the intention of sleeping and getting those all important 7-8 hours sleep. But then I sit scrolling through Twitter, Instagram and YouTube, and before I know it, I'm down to 6 hours or less. 

My aim for the next week or so is to create a nighttime routine, and then try and stick to it!

K E E P  H Y D R A T E D

If I'm not drinking enough water, I get all moody and I definitely feel less energised than when I keep my hydration levels up. I also find that I get really bad headaches if I haven't been drinking enough water, making me feel even more tired than I already am.

I always try and keep a huge glass of water topped up while I'm at desk at work - this way I can just keep sipping on it throughout the day, and I was surprised by how quickly this became a habit when I first started!

E A T  W E L L

In my case, this is quite often eating too little, but eating the wrong food can also be a bit of an issue in draining your energy levels. Making sure you're getting enough fruit & veg, protein and healthy fats (which yes, includes avocado!), can really make all the difference to how you feel throughout the day.

E X E R C I S E  R E G U L A R L Y

I have currently fallen so far off the exercise band wagon, it's terrible and I genuinely feel awful for it. I know from personal experience, and experience which I've written about on this blog before, how genuinely amazing those endorphins can make you feel. When I manage to drag my bum to the gym before work, I have so much more energy and I'm always so much more productive!

Do you guys have any tips on how to not feel so tired? 


Life admin & getting yourself organised.

Otherwise known as; getting your sh*t together.

If there's any kind of admin that I detest and put off the most, it's the 'life' kind. Work admin tasks - well, it's my job and I'm paid to do those. Blog admin, I can just about cope with because I love my blog. But life admin really makes me sigh.

It's the remembering to pay your bills, sort out car insurance and bank accounts, as well as doing your finances, your washing, cleaning the flat and attempting to keep some sort of food stocked up in the fridge. Why is life so hectic all of the time and why do I actually have to do adult stuff?

So, here is a little list of things that I've found helpful, or that I'm going to attempt to do going forward, in a bid to make all of the life admin stuff a little less troublesome.

Automate paying your bills, if you can. | I think we can all agree that paying bills is one of our least favourite things to do. And I'm pretty sure that I suffer from a selective memory - only seemingly being able to remember to do things that I want to do. So, setting up standing orders and direct debits to pay our bills was the best thing I ever did! It means everything is paid on time and we get no angry reminders through the post!

Use your phone. | I often feel like I don't make enough use of my phone. Even simple things like using the calendar to keep track of meetings and events, and setting myself reminders to remember to do those little tasks while I'm out and about, that I know I'm going to forget about unless I have something to remind me. With all of the apps available now, we practically have a personal assistant at our finger tips, so I'm determined to make sure I use this more!

Spend less time on social media. | I have a talent for spending hours aimlessly scrolling through social media. Valuable time that could be spent doing a lot more, *ahem*, productive stuff. As a blogger, I tell myself that this time is simply me carrying out my hobby, but then other times it literally gets ridiculous and I even get mad at myself for how much time I've just wasted. Cutting back this time means that I'll have more than enough time to do more of other stuff, like replying to blog emails and getting a little more creative.

Declutter & have a clear out. | Quite often, my flatmate will ask me what my plans are or the for the weekend, and quite often, my reply consists of - 'sorting my life out' - which basically means I'm gonna have a declutter of my room and try and have a clear out. I find that if my surroundings are organised, I feel a lot more organised. It's also a task that makes me feel super productive, and like I've really achieved something by the end of it.

Set aside a certain amount of time each week, and stick to it. | For me, this seems to be a Sunday evening. It's like my brain kicks into gear and likes to get ready for the new week ahead a little early, ticking off everything that's left on my to-do list, so that I can start Monday morning with a clean slate. And I think that this is the key for me, having time to completely clear my to-do list, as there's nothing more that gets me a little on edge than knowing I have stuff I haven't done yet.

Let me know how you tackle your life admin!


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